just my thoughts

Thankful for Healing

Sincerely AngieLeave a comment

“There’s only so much healing that can be done in isolation. You have to be triggered by the real world to see if the healing works.” -Crissle

I told y’all a few posts ago that I am finding out a lot about myself in this season of my life. I was always sure of who I was/am. Not in the sense that I can’t learn more about me but I thought that at the core of me, I knew me. Well little did I know, it would be “AI” to show me, that I, indeed have work to do. Deep rooted childhood work.

There’s a trend on TikTok of mostly women, using Gemini(AI) to merge pictures of current them, hugging their younger self. I love me so much that I thought it would be great to see a picture of little me and big me in one picture. Baby, little did I know, little me needed that hug I saw in the picture. Of course it’s AI but I’m a visual person, so, I sobbed. I sat with a friend and shared it with them also and I sobbed even more.

Even though I am the “strong one”, behind these walls, rests someone who is indeed vulnerable and has questions that need answering. I’d say 25 year old me to 41 year old me has life under control. Twenty-four year old me on back, needs a bit of clarity. Forty-one year old me is secure, confident, loyal, at peace, happy, content, growing, learning, living by faith, comfortable, stable, trustworthy and so much more. But there’s a part of me that was triggered by that picture. Now I have to get with her and see why and what she has to say.

You can navigate the world so much better when you are in charge of you, your emotions and your well being. It’s easier to have compassion and sympathy for others when you realize that every day is a journey and everything is not a personal attack. This understanding and knowing comes from learning yourself and having grace. So here I am, doing both, learning myself and giving myself grace. There’s no way you can know that there is a part of you that’s hurting and you do nothing to fix it. Let the healing begin! #HappyHealing

  • Part of this post was written months ago. It wasn’t until recently that I read it and decided that now is the perfect time for it.
  • I read a book on Inner Child Work, you can check it out here. It’s an e-book that was written by my Therapist cousin Arianne Washington with Elite Therapy. Visit https://www.elitetherapy.love/

Sincerely,

Angie

How I’m Starting My Mornings

Sincerely AngieLeave a comment
Post originally written 10/26/2023

I was listening to a podcast (Blessed and Bossed Up) the other day and the
host talked about 5 steps to take, to start your mornings and how to focus. That
got me to thinking about what I could do in the morning to be more intentional with
my time with God and my gratitude. I started to picture in my mind what was
feasible for me in the morning. 

First thing I tend to do is look over at my clock to see the time and then
let my baby Rockie out to do his thang. Depending on the time, I will grab my
phone and swipe through the notifications. Then I realize that I hadn’t thanked
God yet and put it down to give thanks. I usually have a text message waiting
for me with a inspirational/motivational video, so I lay with my eyes closed
and listen to that. Then I get up and start my day, that’s if I don’t fall back off to
sleep.

There was no intentionality to the start of my days at all. Also, the other
day I saw a video where someone was saying to laugh for 20 seconds when you
wake up to set your mind to happy. They named a few other things but I forgot
what they were. I took this as a sign that I needed to change my morning
routine.

This is what comes to mind for me. When I wake up, the first thing I do is open my eyes so the first thing that comes to mind is to be grateful for another day and the gift of sight. The second thing is to sit up or switch positions so that it’s a little harder to fall back asleep. Thirdly, be still. Fourthly, give thanks and speak affirmations to myself and for the day. Fifthly, find a scripture to study/meditate on for the day. Ex. “This is the day that the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it!” Lastly, get up and stretch.

  • See Opening your eyes to see the gifts before you. The gift of sight, the roof over your head, your bed, the electricity is on and you have breath in your body. Just to name a few.
  • Sit up or switch positions Prepare your mind and body to wake up fully to start your day.
  • Stillness Be still. No TV, no phone, no distractions. Just take a moment to breathe.
  • Say/Speak Give thanks for the new day that you were blessed with. Speak positive words, thoughts and affirmations for the day.
  • Scripture Meditate on a scripture for the day or think of a positive word to speak to yourself and others throughout the day.
  • Stretch Stand up and stretch out your arms to heaven, expand your chest, take deep breaths, bend over and touch your toes. Loosen those muscles.

This blueprint may not be meant for everyone but it’s helping me and hopefully it can help you. Just as I was motivated based on the podcast I heard, you too can be motivated. Alter these steps to your liking. Happy grateful, thankful and positive mornings!

Sincerely,

Angie

Who Are You?

Sincerely AngieLeave a comment

Currently, I am in a season of learning so much about who I am, even though I’ve always been confident and sure of who I was, outside of knowing my purpose. But as of late, I am finding out things that are rooted. I won’t share it all just yet because I still value privacy but I will try to bring it all home to make the title of this post make sense.

There are a few questions I have always had problems with people asking. Whether they were too invasive or just irrelevant to the person asking or the situation at hand. The whole time, all I’m thinking to myself is, once I answer it, what are you doing with the information? Are we getting married, are you hiring me, does this determine if we’re friends or not, are you helping me achieve anything? Is this question a space filler, or rhetorical?

The easiest and most common question came from young men to women. “Who do you stay with?” Now, I am far from dumb and I know there are multiple reasons for a guy to want to know the answer to this question, but at this “big ole age”, why is that the way the question is framed? Moving on because I can go off topic with that one. Second question, “What’s your five/ten year plan?” This question sends me because, TO ME, it’s such a personal question. If I’m just meeting you, why should I or why would I share that with a stranger? Again, I understand what the person may be getting at but TO ME, I’m sure there’s a less invasive way to ask a person their future plans or goals. Because honestly, if you just sit back and listen, people will eventually tell you exactly who they are!

Lastly, a question that I am always perplexed by is when someone asks “Who are you?” I’ve heard people answer “I’m a mother or I’m a real estate agent”, and the person asking the question responds, “No, not what you do. Who are YOU?”. I’ve answered “I’m a child of God, or a lover of life, or a student of life” just to name a few. And still, that answer wasn’t what they were looking for. My thought, to the asker of the question is, it seems that no response given suffices. I absolutely 1000% understand that they want the person to dig deeper and know that they aren’t just “a mother, or a doctor, or a helper”.

I wonder what gauge is being used to determine what answer suffices? At the core of this question, it seems that we are supposed to narrow ourselves down to just one characteristic, trait, title, quality, ability, etc. As humans, we are so much more than one thing. We don’t have to be either or, we can be both and. And since most of us are always learning and growing, it can’t just be a single answer to who are you. It must be, “who are you in THIS moment?”. This blog, my podcast, my YouTube channel, etc. are all proof that I am and cannot be narrowed down to just one thing. It’s literally a gumbo pot over here baby!

Over the last few months that I’ve been finding out more about myself, I’ve had to check myself. My father hadn’t been around since I was 4 or 5 years old. So growing up, that side of me didn’t exist and I was fine with not knowing. Yes, I may have been curious over the years but I had no luck finding the answers. It wasn’t until God saw fit and now, finding that side of myself has garnered so many revelations. I’m learning the balances of the two DNA’s that merged together to make me and why some things never made sense on one side of me. Reality check! I’m so much more than whoever I thought I was before. I have added knowledge that has ignited a power within me that overwhelms me with so much joy! Because knowledge is power!

Sincerely,

Angie