Currently, I am in a season of learning so much about who I am, even though I’ve always been confident and sure of who I was, outside of knowing my purpose. But as of late, I am finding out things that are rooted. I won’t share it all just yet because I still value privacy but I will try to bring it all home to make the title of this post make sense.
There are a few questions I have always had problems with people asking. Whether they were too invasive or just irrelevant to the person asking or the situation at hand. The whole time, all I’m thinking to myself is, once I answer it, what are you doing with the information? Are we getting married, are you hiring me, does this determine if we’re friends or not, are you helping me achieve anything? Is this question a space filler, or rhetorical?
The easiest and most common question came from young men to women. “Who do you stay with?” Now, I am far from dumb and I know there are multiple reasons for a guy to want to know the answer to this question, but at this “big ole age”, why is that the way the question is framed? Moving on because I can go off topic with that one. Second question, “What’s your five/ten year plan?” This question sends me because, TO ME, it’s such a personal question. If I’m just meeting you, why should I or why would I share that with a stranger? Again, I understand what the person may be getting at but TO ME, I’m sure there’s a less invasive way to ask a person their future plans or goals. Because honestly, if you just sit back and listen, people will eventually tell you exactly who they are!
Lastly, a question that I am always perplexed by is when someone asks “Who are you?” I’ve heard people answer “I’m a mother or I’m a real estate agent”, and the person asking the question responds, “No, not what you do. Who are YOU?”. I’ve answered “I’m a child of God, or a lover of life, or a student of life” just to name a few. And still, that answer wasn’t what they were looking for. My thought, to the asker of the question is, it seems that no response given suffices. I absolutely 1000% understand that they want the person to dig deeper and know that they aren’t just “a mother, or a doctor, or a helper”.
I wonder what gauge is being used to determine what answer suffices? At the core of this question, it seems that we are supposed to narrow ourselves down to just one characteristic, trait, title, quality, ability, etc. As humans, we are so much more than one thing. We don’t have to be either or, we can be both and. And since most of us are always learning and growing, it can’t just be a single answer to who are you. It must be, “who are you in THIS moment?”. This blog, my podcast, my YouTube channel, etc. are all proof that I am and cannot be narrowed down to just one thing. It’s literally a gumbo pot over here baby!
Over the last few months that I’ve been finding out more about myself, I’ve had to check myself. My father hadn’t been around since I was 4 or 5 years old. So growing up, that side of me didn’t exist and I was fine with not knowing. Yes, I may have been curious over the years but I had no luck finding the answers. It wasn’t until God saw fit and now, finding that side of myself has garnered so many revelations. I’m learning the balances of the two DNA’s that merged together to make me and why some things never made sense on one side of me. Reality check! I’m so much more than whoever I thought I was before. I have added knowledge that has ignited a power within me that overwhelms me with so much joy! Because knowledge is power!
Sincerely,
Angie
